It was an inspired moment as I waited in line with friends who wanted to be the first with their hands on the iPad: go inside with them, exist after them, pretend to have bought the device so as to receive undeserved acclaim from Apple employees and fanboys.

I consider it one of my greatest Internet actions. God, I wish I could sell commemorative plates of the moment. Be sure to check out the YouTube comments as they transition from what I did to a debate about communism