Baratunde

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Microsoft stores show why we should have kept the Electric Slide away from white people

Crunchgear has already pointed out that these Microsoft Stores are clear knockoffs of Apple Stores, and this spontaneous dance thing is a knockoff of Improv Everywhere

But this scene is troublesome for reasons beyond that:

  • It just hurt my heart to watch this. It made me feel bad in my heart! It was deeper than pity and more potent than sadness. I just kept thinking: "No, no no no." and "But why? Why, why why why?"
  • I had to force myself to sit through it. It was like watching a child pick its nose, slowly and then bring it to you full of pride as if the kid had done something worthwhile. 
  • How is this supposed to encourage sales? If I'm walking by this in a mall, I see a bunch of brightly colored t-shirt wearing people dancing in unison, and I'm thinking: "Oh that's nice. They've let the developmentally challenged out for a field trip."
  • It's way too long. It's actually the full four minutes and 45 seconds. Who does that??
  • WTF does this have to do with helping people understand Microsoft products? Will corny dancing help prevent spyware and viruses from destroying your computer?
  • What's up with those people not dancing and not even paying attention to the dancing? They're just on laptops in the background like this is a normal situation. This is not normal! It demands attention! Horrific, cringe-inducing attention!
  • Why do I have a feeling this is all Steve Ballmer's fault
I can only hope no one at Microsoft has heard of the Cupid Shuffle yet.

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