Page 7 of the print edition

I sent in a bunch. Here's the full list. They went with #4. Which is your favorite?
 
1. Schematics for the Death Star
 
2. A presidential pardon for your best friend
 
3. Advance copy of his newest book: How To Monday Morning Quarterback Even After Losing And Ruining The Game For Everyone Else
 
4. An unexpectedly warm and firm hug
 
5. A vibrator with which you can go fuck yourself
 
6. He will greet them as liberators