Debate Party Outcome


After noting the entertainment value of the first presidential debate (or should I say ass-whoopin), I decided to have over fifteen of my coolest closest funniest friends to watch round two. Thanks to TiVo, we were really able to analyze the graphic things John Kerry did to Dubya's butthole. Here's my post-debate spin...

Well it was a good night for Boston teams. Sox won and so did Kerry. Thanks to everyone who came to the standup show and to those who rolled to the new phlat after.

This had to be the best debate party going tonight.

In attendance, 15 people. We had some lawyers, activists, campaigners, doctors, students and business people.

We kept score on a whiteboard. Final tally. President Kerry (11), Bitch-Ass Bush (-4).


    Kerry highlights
  • "weapons of mass deception"
  • "how does a compassionate conservative cut 500,000 kids from Headstart?"
  • "we did something you don't know how to do. we balanced the budget" (dayammmm!!)



    Kerry Lowlights
  • "I'm a lawyer too" (that's not gonna ever help you. ever. everybody hates lawyers. even lawyers hate lawyers)



    Bush highlights
  • messing up Silvio Berlusconi's name (this was just funny)
  • calling on Reagan (apparently, he's popular)
  • tort reform (see "I'm a lawyer too" above)



    Bush lowlights
  • referring to foreigners as "these people" as in "I know how these people think." (lemme guess, some of your best friends are "these people." you have "these people" over for dinner??)
  • "it's hard work" (again!)
  • barrelling over the moderator so he could speak
  • "increase wetlands by 3 million" (what units biatch?? parsecs or blades of grass???)
  • pro-slavery position on Dred Scott decision (yes, dubya came out FOR slavery, and nobody's called him on it


We also gave out random points to party-goers and others


  • 1pt: final town hall questioner who asked bush to identify 3 mistakes. he gave none

  • 1pt: chris lowell, partygoer, who correctly interpreted bush's facial expression "He's sayin so many things!"

  • 1pt: deborah kobes, partygoer and former tax policy researcher. when bush accused kerry of being a big gov spender she almost choked, "but bush-- he's the government spending guy!! that's what he does. he spends!"

  • 1pt: matt chun, partygoer. "bush sure has a lot of proposals, but hasn't he BEEN president?"


Some immediate post-debate online poll results

LA Times (has a set of "mover" questions). Major numbers include 12.3% was for bush now for kerry, 64.6% was for kerry and still am, 19.4% was undecided now for kerry. comparable figures on bush side are: 0.4%, 2.2%, 0.5%

NBC
69% kerry
31% bush

CNN
78% kerry
20% bush
2% even

CBS
88% kerry
12% bush

YAHOO
64% kerry
33% bush

FOXNEWS
50% kerry
49% bush

stay tuned for more real debate analysis next time...